Dear Gwendolyn:

I have been married for 22 years and my husband has been acting as if he has no interest in me. This started immediately after our wedding. I tolerated it because I didn’t want my marriage to appear to be a failure.


This is the problem: On Valentine’s Day I purchased a beautiful short see-through gown.

When I tried to attempt to court him, he said, “I hate Valentine’s Day.” I then went into my bedroom and cried.

Another incident was when I had the flu, he told me that he didn’t want to catch my cold. So, he got into his car and drove for nine hours to visit a male friend. I was really sick. I needed him to be there to make soup and to give me water and juices.

Gwendolyn, for years I had begged him to go on various vacations. He never wanted to go and didn’t go. But, when two of his male buddies suggested to go on vacation, he wanted to go. I went along but I was totally ignored.

What can I do to cause him to have an interest in me?—Sarah

Dear Sarah:

There is nothing you can do and I do hate to hear that you have tolerated his bad attitude and lack of interest in you.

There are many women who are walking in your shoes—a husband who has no interest and doesn’t mind showing it.

Sarah, there is something a little strange about your husband.

Think about it. What man do you know would leave a sick wife and drive nine hours to visit another man? Could be nothing to it, but I don’t know and you should give a little thought to his many actions. I won’t say that your husband is on the down low, but I will say that he is—low down.

(Got a problem, e-mail her at: or write to her at address above [to receive a reply, send a self-addressed stamped envelope].)

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