I have been married for 12 years. I always thought my marriage was good. However, people would make comments in front of me that my husband was being unfaithful. I would ignore them because I knew it wasn’t true. We have three small children. Because of the children, I knew I had him.
Gwendolyn, my life overnight turned upside down. I was doing my laundry when I received a call saying my husband had been shot. The caller said he was being airlifted to the hospital. The hospital was three hours away. I was too upset to drive myself, so I asked my brother to take me.
Upon arriving at the hospital I was told my husband was still in surgery. When the surgery was finished, doctors came out and said, “Your husband is paralyzed from neck down.” The problem is he was shot by a woman. I love my husband and plan to care for him at home. When we married, I said “for better or for worse.”—Christine
Dear Christine: All women repeat those vows. Those words mean nothing—just something to be saying.
It is unfortunate your husband was shot by an outside woman. All while you thought you had a prize, you had nothing at all. I know you wish to stand by your man like Tammy did, but you shouldn’t. Put that man in a nursing home facility. Go to visit, but not every day. You would only allow your body’s immune system to weaken and you would also become ill.
Christine, you won’t be able to provide proper care to your husband. Think about it. Regardless of what you said at the altar, it’s not about you and definitely not about that cheating husband. It’s all about caring to the needs—of your children.
(Got a problem, email Gwen at: firstname.lastname@example.org or write to her at P. O. Box 10066, Raleigh, NC 27605-0066. To receive a reply, send a self-addressed stamped envelope .Visit her website at: www.gwenbaines.com.)