:10 Yo Johnny, wake my man up. Tell him its past 2:30…time to go. Hey Moammar…Moammar…Gahdafi…wake up man time to go. Huh what time is it? It’s almost 3:00 a.m. man way past closing time! I got nowhere to go, the rebels ran me out my crib…I got no one to turn to. Alright my man let me help you here. No. 1 you should have read the Saddam book, especially the last Chapter. No. 2 turn your butt to the door that’s where you turn. And No. 3 you already know this from the parties you gave at the compound…you ain’t gotta go home but you gotta get the hell outta here…and leave that $37.50 for the wings and beer!!! (I tried to tell Moammar what was up last week when he was here. My cousin is in the National Guard he told me what was coming down, but dude is hard headed).
:09 If your name is BOLT as in USAIN BOLT, the fastest man in the world you know you were born to run.
:08 Opening Day NCAA College Football: (1) If I was Oregon or LSU I wouldn’t play either one of us on opening day. (2) Hey “Oregon Ducks” love the uniforms man! (3) Notre Dame…it’s called “karma” baby. For all those years you treated everybody like second class citizens. (4) Boise State is the Real Deal again. Oklahoma, Alabama, Ohio State, Auburn, Stanford all coming at ya again. Get ready they’re all set for a top ten finish. (5) Pitt…not the barn burner we expected based on what you said. But a win is a win.
:07 Do “they” have to keep saying Vick and Plaxico were in jail…we know that mmmaaannn!
:06 “They” had a Labor Day Concert over at the stadium last week for Pitt and all that. “They” had “The Clark’s”…“Stunz”…“Rock City” and “Brett Michaels…guess who “They” didn’t want to come to the concert? You!!! Wake-up and smell the truth people!!!
:05 I tell you this every year. It’s high school football time. Don’t just send your young men out to play, go watch them play. Everybody please support high school football and everything that goes with it. HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL…IT’S FANTASTIC. And your New Pittsburgh Courier brings it to you up close and in color every week.
:04 Speaking of high school sports and I was, every parent in the city of Pittsburgh whether you have a student-athlete or not should be marching on over to the Board of Education and demanding that a 2.0…C average be the bare minimum THAT A STUDENT-ATHLETE can receive in order to play any sport. If you accept anything less you’re doing your child a dis-service. You should not allow or accept your child playing and/or passing with D’s. It is an insult to the child, the parent and quite honestly our community. Why do you think they’re called STUDENT-ATHLETES?!?!
:03 Do yourself a favor fellas and sit down and watch the “The Dirty Dozen” from start to finish. It’s still one of the best ever. Run Jefferson run…Go, Go, Go!!!
:02 Listen, the location of the White Par-Tay is under a cover, so don’t worry about the chance of rain. The White Par-Tay is still on at the Fox Chapel Yacht Club Thursday, Sept. 8—6-8 pm. Reception–D.J. EZ, E–Old School Set–Over 30 Crowd Only–Dress White it’s your last chance before you put your gear away for the winter–Yes there is a prize for the best dressed couple–in white –Cash Bar–Cash Kitchen (no free food)-$20 donation benefits the Champions’ Toys for Tots Christmas Party and Toy Give-Away. Call The Champions if you need information, 412-628-4856.
:01 Fellas did you see Serena Williams do that awesome split…opps, I mean return that ball…Wow!!!
~ Game Over ~
…I mean really over
(hey I am only human…I’m just a man)