:10 How come no one’s talking about Vjay Singh and Phil Nicholson not winning any golf tournaments. And where’s that European cat that was going to be the next greatest ever? GET OFF Tiger’s back. I ‘m just saying.
:09 I had some great conversation with Fred Crawford, Dereck Shelton, Richard Portis and the fellas down at the Highland Park Tennis Courts, and yes they were all wrong. But Lord knows I tried to help the brothers to a better understanding. That said, I will officially go on record…in print…and tell you what I told them, they of the Miami Heat offensive. The Heat will not repeat, the Heat will not be in the NBA Finals in 2012…take it to the bank! (That’s where I’ll be taking their money when I win the bet!)
:08 Alright Roland Slade, after non-stop tireless investigation here’s the end result and the Top 10 Connie Hawkins League Teams of all time. Live with it mmaaannn!!!
(1) Rankin Gangsters, 3 Titles, Coach Eddie Jefferies; (2) Cosmic Echoes, 2 titles, Coach Slade and LaVaughn Johnson; (3) The Force, 2 titles, Coach Richard Allen; (4) The Rebels, 2 titles, Coach Karen Hall; (5) Panthers, 2 titles, Coach Rico Appendanza; (6) Rise High, 2 titles, Coach “Dre;” (7) Nets, 1 title, Coach “Titus;” (8) Greyhounds, 1 title, Coach Andre McDonald; (9) The Heat, 1 Title, Coach Ron Boggus; (10) [tie] Clairton’s Finest, 1 title, Coach “Hook;” Fire, 1 title, Coach “Tuna Fish”
Now be advised I could be off on the last five it’s been a long time but the first five are tight. E-mail me if you have a better list, I’ll put it in the paper, email@example.com
:07 Speaking of lists, and I was. Here’s my Top 10 summer tunes that the moment you hear the first chord it takes you “back in the day:” 1. Superfly—Curtis Mayfield 2. I’ll Take You There—Staples Singers 3. Ain’t To Proud To Beg—Temptations 4. Shaft—Isaac Hayes 5. Any and All Earth Wind & Fire 6. Flashlight—Parliament 7. I Feel Good—James Brown 8. Play That Funky Music White Boy—Wild Cherry 9. Super Freak—Rick James 10. Summer Breeze—Isley Brothers (special add on…Summer Madness–Kool & The Gang)
:06 Correction…Archie McGill did not play on the 1966 Schenley State title team. He graduated in 1965. But he did set the tone for their greatness. Thanks for the heads up “Arch.”
:05 MAZE IS COMIN…MAZE IS COMIN…MAZE IS COMIN…I guess you haters will give Chuck Sanders his props now!? Blow it up big fella, blow it up! And go to the Savoy Restaurant will ya…borrow the money from your mom!
:04 Sista’s…Ladies…My Queen’s…Baby…please, please, please stop putting that nasty deodorant under your arms that cakes up. You got on the sexy summer dress and heels then you lift your arms up and…Bam! C’mon buy the good stuff. Why you ask am I putting this in a sports column?
Two reasons: 1. Somebody needs to tell you…Yeah you!
2. Chasing women is the Number 1 sport in the world.
:03 SET YOUR CALENDARS WE’RE COMING DOWN THE STRETCH:
Labor Day Monday, Sept. 5 The Champions Mixed Doubles Labor Day Tennis Tournament Highland Park Tennis Courts—All talent levels welcome—Great fun day to play or watch great tennis—$10 registration per person, benefits Champions Toys for Tots—call to register 412-628-4856—Donna Bey and Jim Quigley Tournament Directors.
The Fox Chapel Yacht Club is the place to be Thursday, Sept.8 Champions/SoulPitt/Five Star Corporation Ultimate White Party. The last great summer bash—starring DJ EZ E and The Fabulous Diamond Models—Old School Style—free parking, cash bar, cash kitchen (that means no free food to you Westinghouse Grads) 6-8 p.m. Reception time (after 8 you might not get a seat) Over 30, ID Required. If you’re having a birthday, bring your party to our Par-Tay!!!—$20 donation benefits Champions Toys for Tots—also includes The Connie Hawkins Basketball League Reunion Party. Only $10 for ex-CHL Players with ID—Don’t miss the Par-Tay and “YOU CAN BET YOUR LAST MONEY IT’S GONNA BE A STONE GAS HONEY!!!”
:02 And go get some new white gear, don’t wear that same stuff you been wearing all summer. C’mon man…c’mon women!!
:01 For all you ex-ballers, the Connie Hawkins Reunion Party is all about bringing everyone together to remember the good times before we go on to that great hoop court in the sky like some of our fallen heroes.
~ Game Over ~