You have your father’s eyes.
Some say you looked more like Mom when you were little, but you favor Dad now. Same hair, same laugh, same sense of humor.
And the thing is, there isn’t a lot you can do about it. You are who you are.
In the new book “I Was Born This Way,” Archbishop Carl Bean (with David Ritz) tells about his childhood, careers, and God’s love and acceptance.
Young Carl Bean never really knew his father, and he barely knew his birth mother. Born and raised in a poor area of Baltimore, Bean was basically raised by a village of “warm and wonderful women.” He says that he was a girly little boy, soft and feminine, and he was attracted to other boys at an early age. He believes that those who raised him must have known about those feelings, but nothing was ever said. Bean was loved, and that’s what he knew.
The shining point of his life was his godmother’s mother, the woman Bean called Nana. She cared for him, took him to church, and made him happy, but when he was just 3-years-old, Nana died and life changed drastically. He was taken in by his godparents, who loved him but didn’t seem to like him. Shortly after that, Bean was sexually assaulted by an “uncle.”
Though various abuses continued well into his teens, and though Bean had acknowledged his gayness, he maintains that he was cherished and accepted—especially by the unaware wives of his abusers.
Fortunately, he found solace in God and in song.
Bean sang in good times and bad, for audiences of none or many. He was encouraged and tutored, and when he was old enough, he moved to New York City to pursue a gospel music career, quickly making a name for himself on the gospel circuit. He followed that with a disco career and a top-selling record.
But at different points in his life, Bean was homeless, which showed him what God truly wanted him to do. After his musical career ended, he started a church and opened his arms to the LGBTQ community. He began an AIDS outreach program through his ministry. He “became unconditionally loved.”
“I Was Born This Way” is a wonderful biography that’s curiously soothing to read.
As an author, Bean is brutally honest in telling his story, which is both sweetly idyllic and frighteningly horrifying. Still, despite the nastiness he endured, he manages to convey a sense of calm and comfort, and a peaceful demeanor. That makes this, oddly, more like a hug than a book.
If you’re up for something good, “I Was Born This Way” is worth laying eyes on.
(“I Was Born This Way” by Archbishop Carl Bean (with David Ritz), c.2010, Simon & Schuster, $24/ $32 Canada, 264 pages.)