I have been divorced for five years. While married, I started a relationship with a lady who worked at the same company with me. Two months after my divorce I moved in with her. Everything was great until the issue of my children.
This is the problem: For the last five years she has refused to allow me to keep the children for the weekend or holidays. She does not want me to visit the children at my ex-wife’s house. I see them only at my mother’s house which is not often. She says she loves me and that after we are married, her feelings about my children will remain the same.
Gwendolyn, what do you think?—Harold
Your fiancée has the right to not play the stepmother role. All women are not fond of children. Therefore, you cannot force her to love them as she claims to be in love with you.
Let me tell you this: Single women (and cheating wives) are quick to tell a married man “I love you.” But you men are so into the excitement of it all you fail to ask the three main questions: 1) Will you be able to get along with my ex-wife? 2) Will you love my children? And the big and most important question— 3) Will you still love me when the judge awards most of my income—to my ex-wife?
(Have a problem? Don’t solve it alone. Write to Gwendolyn Baines at: P.O. Box 10066, Raleigh, N.C. 27605-0066 (to receive a reply send a self-addressed stamped envelope) or e-mail her at: firstname.lastname@example.org or visit her website at: www.gwenbaines.com.)